13:2 Nelson Mandela

  Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela was born on July 18, 1918. He would grow up to be perhaps one of the greatest leaders of civil rights movements in the world. Mandela and what he fought for can be related to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Both men had been discriminated against and imprisoned for taking action, but neither man resorted to violence as a means to solve conflicts. Mandela is revered by people all over the world for his determination, strength, and standing up for what is right.

            Apartheid South Africa separated the blacks from the whites, discriminating against blacks similar to Jim Crow laws in the southern parts of the United States. Mandela’s father died when Nelson was young, but he grew hearing stories of great ancestors fighting the apartheid. This is how Mandela became involved with the fight for civil rights. He began studying law and working with the African National Congress. Mandela then developed the ANC Youth League and worked on more radical-based programs for the organization. He was often in and out of imprisonment from leaving the country illegally and working against the government with the ANC, which was banned. Mandela spent twenty-seven years in prison, missing his mother’s and son’s funerals. One imprisonment was for gathering protesters and workers to go on strike. He received a life sentence after his famous “Speech from the Dock” in 1964, in which he declared, “I have fought against white domination, and I have fought against black domination. I have cherished the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and with equal opportunities. It is an ideal which I hope to live for and to achieve. But if needs be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die.”

            After the ban on the ANC was released, Mandela was free from imprisonment. He then won a Nobel Peace Prize, voted for the first time, and was elected the first president of democratic South Africa. Mandela’s later life included starting the Nelson Mandela Children’s Fund, Nelson Mandela Foundation, and Mandela Rhodes Foundation; writing books about himself; working with the Fifa World Cup; meeting with the First Lady and her daughters; and spending much time with his family (as well as in the hospital). His age caught up with him, ending with his death on December 5, 2013. Mandela, then 95, proved to be a true activist and voice for the victims of the discrimination in apartheid South Africa. Not only did he never give up, but Mandela also did not resort to violence, which happens with so many passionate people. Mandela will forever be remembered as the face of democratic South Africa as well as racial equality and social justice.

            

13:1 man's best friend

They're always by your side; know when you're hurt; would do anything for you. 

Dogs are magnificent creatures. Not only are they loyal, but lovable, intelligent, and caring.  From my experiences as well as observing other dogs, I know they really are man's best friend. It's too bad not everyone sees them this way. 

Watching the documentary Babies, several very patient and tolerant dogs, as well as other animals, come into play. The babies climb on them, pull on them, and do all sorts of obnoxious things. But the dogs remain calm. There are then shots of the animals and babies lying together, implying that the dogs care for and protect the children. 

My neighbors with four boys, aged 2 to 6, have a very gentle dog as well. She is never harsh around the children and doesn't react when they run into her or mess with her. She seems to understand that the boys need to be cared for, though she loves playing fetch and getting the parents' attention to herself. 

My dog, too, is very gentle and tolerant, and always has been. He's a smaller breed, but still bug enough to not get crushed by us laying on him. We got him with my brother was two, and gas pretty much been a pillow ever since. He has never bitten anyone and tolerates nearly everything. He's not too keen of being picked up, but he'll even remain calm when we give him baths. He is an amazing family dog- low key but will play if you want, and very gentle, even with little ones. 

I saw a very touching story online from a veterinarian. The doctor said he received a call that a dog wasn't doing well, and the best option would be to put the dog down. The family wanted their six year old son to be there as well. So the doctor went to the family's house and calmly laid the dog to rest. Everyone suspected that the child did not understand what was going on. However, the child then spoke up with the message that the purpose of life is to learn to love one another and be happy, so dogs have shorter lives because they already do that. 

All of these stories compile my love of dogs and why I agree that they are man's, woman's, and child's best friends. 

10:1 pastoral to sublime

History really does repeat itself. By examining cultural and literary trends, we can see reoccurring themes throughout time. One such example is the Enlightenment period followed by the Romantic period, similar to the 1950s compared to the 60s. In the first of each set of periods, people were very traditional and science-based. The subsequent periods involved people rebelling against the accepted culture and turning toward the appreciation of sublime nature and awesome thoughts.

In the Enlightenment period, we see Shakepeare's works and John  Milton's Paradise Lost. The 19th century then begins the Romantic period and the pursuit of the unknown. Works such as "Kubla Khan" and Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. The focus shifts to the inability of science and sublime nature. Authors react against logic, and fill their works with emotion and passion. 

A century later, the 1950s bring conservative views and traditional family values. The next decade is then full of activists, drugs, and rebelling against the "man." More people speak out against societal problems such as environmental issues and civil rights. We see a turn from traditional to relaxed styles of thinking and living. 

These shifts in culture have reoccurred once, I wonder when thoughts will shift again.  

9:2 'tis the season

"I Want a Hippopotomaus for Chiristmas" is on the radio, houses are decorated with beautiful lights, and stores are filled with holiday supplies. Too bad it's only November. 

Christmas is my favorite holiday, yes, but Thanksgiving still deserves to be appreciated and celebrated. The meanings of these two holidays seems to get more lost  each year. Everyone seems to focus on Christmas and getting good deals on gifts than anything else. There of course are outliers and people who really do respect each holiday and the meaning behind them, but the country runs on money, unfortunately. 

Last November, I was excited for Christmas and I watched the Hallmark movies and listened to the songs once they started playing. This year, though, I feel Christmas has gotten out of hand, and not in a way that would be great- more giving, a sense of togetherness in the community- but trying to get people to buy more. Black Friday in itself is strange to me: let's give thanks for everything one day, and the next, let's trampled each other and do whatever it takes to get a good deal. However, stores are now having sale days even the week before Thanksgiving and staying open on the holiday as well. I believe everyone deserves the opportunity to stay home for the holiday. Some people not celebrate, and that's perfectly respectable, but employees shouldn't have to chose between staying home with family or their paycheck on Thanksgiving day. It's a day to spend time with each other, and give thanks, as strange as that may sound, given the name. But in most cases, the holiday is about food and football, which is disappointing to me. 

I wish more people, and especially business owners, respected each holiday in itself. Thanksgiving is lost in the Black Friday chaos, where the meaning of Christmas goes with it. Christmas is my favorite holiday because of the weather, the stories, the wonder and excitement of children, and the giving and helping natures people seem to pick up around this time. If more people focused even a little big more on the meaning of the holidays and not depending their happiness on material items, then each holiday would be respected, and I would be happy. 

9:1 act 5:scene 2

Act 5 Scene 1 of Hamlet- let's just say, it gets pretty crazy. Why everyone has to die in the end? I don't know. But it happens. Poor Horatio is the only survivor, needing to carry on in honor of Hamlet. 

Leading up to this climatic ending, Ophelia was the only one dead, besides Old Hamlet, of course. The last scene portrays the brutal deaths of 6 people within a matter of pages. Laertes and Hamlet duel. Gertrude sees Hamlet winning, so raises a toast in celebration, poisoning herself. Hamlet is then wounded and in turn wounds Laertes. Before he dies, Laertes proclaims that Claudius was responsible for setting everything up. Hamlet then turns the sword on Claudius, then falls. Right after all this, English ambassadors enter, speaking of the deaths of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. Hamlet had sent replacement letters to the king of England, with orders to kill these two instead of Hamlet. That brings the total to 6 deaths, which is why the play is considered a tragedy. 

Perhaps everyone "deserved" to die, though the deaths of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are debatable. These two characters do not seem to have minds of their own. They are ordered to watch Hamlet by the king, so they do. They are also Hamlet's old friends, so they continue to be so. Do they deserve to be killed for following orders? That seems a little harsh, even if they should have thought for themselves. If you look through Hamlet's point of view, however, he didn't necessarily know Rosencrantz and Guildenstern didn't know what message they were carrying. They were simply carrying out an order from the king, who would likely have told them it was to protect Hamlet. Because Hamlet knew they were transporting a death sentence, he thought he had been betrayed by his old friends. Who wouldn't be upset? However, death still seems a harsh punishment. Did they deserve to die? The world may never know...

8:2 oh, that this too, too sullied flesh would melt...

"Oh, that this too, too sullied flesh would melt,thaw, and resolve itself into a dew, or that the Everlasting had not fixed His canon 'gainst self slaughter!" Strong words. 

Hamlet begins his first soliloquy with these words, enlightening the audience to just how upset he is. He has right to be upset as well: his beloved father is dead, Denmark has lost a great king, and his mother has remarried- to his late father's brother. Who wouldn't be upset?

Hamlet goes on to describe the world as useless and compares it to an unweeded garden. A world where the negatives and ugliness overpower the beauty and worth. He cannot believe the brevity since his father's passing, and the apathy everyone else seems to feel about the matter. Hamlet knows his father was a great king and a wonderful husband. The more his parents were together, the more they wanted to be together. Yet here his mother is  married to her brother-in-law, when her funeral shoes had not even worn. The tears on her face were not yet dried. Hamlet curses women, giving offence to them more than calling them weak: "Frailty- thy name is woman!" He says that not only are women weak, but they are the epitome of weakness. He says that an animal- a common beast, would have mourned longer for its mate than his mother did for Old Hamlet. Hamlet swears none of this is good, and no good could or will come of it all. However. Though it breaks his heart, he has to remain quiet. 

8:1 who I am

"Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?"

I came across this quote today and it halted me in my tracks. Who am I deep down? If I had no fear or social norms to follow, where would I be? What would I be doing? 

Lately I've become more aware of where I am and where I want to be- who I want to be. Different things are becoming more important to me. My priorities are changing. I'm growing up. 

Soon I'll be on my own, not totally, but enough that I need to take majority of my life as my own responsibility. I will still have support, but the rest is on me. 

I've realized that I have not been a woman of action. I let fear consume me and prevent me from doing things. Disappointing others, looking foolish, and not knowing what will happen. All things that have come across my mind and stopped me from carrying out a plan. 

So now I think, how much would I have accomplished if I had just done what I wanted and not cared what others thought? How many more people would I have helped or great things achieved? How many more friends would I have made or relationships would have been created?

All I can do now is look ahead, as one cannot go back and change things that have been. Just do it. And that's exactly what I need to do. I know I have potential; I am capable of so much. I want to help others. I want to be an influence of change, hope, and passion. I need to let go of the social expectations weighing me down and start flying in my own direction. 

Naturally, I have always been a perfectionist. By this, I mean that even when learning to walk, I wouldn't try until I did it perfectly. My mom was worried because I wasn't walking, but then one day, I was up and moving. I had practiced alone until I had it down. Ever since, I have been a perfectionist. I like to do things my own way, and I am also my own worst enemy. Very very rarely am I not aware of something I have done wrong. I have highly developed intrapersonal skills, while my interpersonal skills need some work. I become nervous and afraid having a simple conversation with someone. I don't know what to expect and become self conscious. Being afraid of communicating with people has been one of the biggest factors of not being active. I have great plans, but needing to communicate with others has sleazy so stopped me. 

Now I am gaining interpersonal skills and have become much more outgoing compared to how I used to be, but I have not carried out any plans yet. My Capstone Project has not been progressing as well as it should be, as I am at the point where I need to start contacting organizations and talking to people. However, I want to have my project become a success, so I will get over my fear of conversations and know I am human, as is everyone else, and everyone makes mistakes. 

Here's to tomorrow- a day full of new experiences, new opportunities, and renewed strength. Let my passions and my inner-self show, and not care what society thinks. I am the writer of my own story, not one chapter in the book of societal norms. Carpe diem; seize the day; just do it. 

7:2 the Hamlet within me

Typically with reading pieces of literature, I am not consciously aware of my a likeness to a character. Perhaps I can relate to characters subconsciously, which is why I like them, but with reading Hamlet, I have realized how I am like the title character. Like Hamlet, I too become paralyzed with thought. I am envious of others who are proactive and do things quickly. They take initiative. Often I know I should do things, as I need to, or they're good things to be done, but I just do t do them. The worst is when I say I will do something and flake. I always get down on myself, as I let myself down, I let others down, and no one else seems to have this problem. However, Hamlet proves that other people are like me, even hundreds of years ago. Some people aren't able to act as quickly, and overthink things. This isn't saying it's okay to not be proactive or flake when you sash you'll do something, but I know this problem isn't just with me. 

Though Hamlet isn't a great role model, he shows me, drastically, effects of overthinking and not acting. I want to do things and not be afraid, or at least have those few seconds of courage. Just getting things done, saying something, or reaching out, would be easier if I gathered that courage. 

I need to stop letting the Hamlet inside me show, and just get stuff done. Like Nike always says,

                                                                   Just do it. 

7:1 got it!

It is so nice to finally have what I've been hoping for. The Academy has surpassed standards I had for the school in all but a few areas. This year however, the missing pieces have been found. I have some of the best teachers I've ever had again, or for the first time, this year. And it is great. I'm learning in all of my classes. I have a sense of achievement and purpose. I'm dedicated to my studies once again. I had lost my willpower for school, but now it is back. There are still some quirks and kinks in the big picture, but I'm not dreading coming to school. 

I'm most excited about the changes my academy has undergone. Freshman year I came in with hope and passion for the medical field, only to be pushed over my limits, one way or another, thereby losing my interest in the medical field. I began to despise it I hated medicine. I hated amuthing to do with it- doctors, nurses, Western medicine practices, others' beliefs. Unreasonable, yes, but how it was. 

Now, however, I have a rekindled passion for the field. I don't do well with bones or gore, but that's not the point. I want to help people. Simple as that. I want to change people's lives for the better, and not just for good karma. My passion is for helping others. In my EMT course, I am being trained to do so. Even if I am not employed as an EMT in the future, the skills I'm learning now- from moving patients to even listening and remembering things better- will help me at some point or another. 

I am so thrilled to have a fantastic teacher for my EMT class that has helped me get reattached to the medical field instead of pushing me farther away. It wasn't a smooth transition, I admit to having a bit of an attitude, but I am overjoyed to be learning and gaining more skills now. 

6:2 wonder

If only the sense of wonder and amazement never left us. Children are so amused by the simplest of things, and want to believe in everything. You think of Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the good in others. As we age, our beliefs in these fantastic creatures and ourselves begin to diminish. So Santa as a man may not exist, but that is not the point. Santa is a representation of Christmas spirit. Believing in him brings children and families together. It brings hope and joy in an imperfect world. It is sad to me when older children and adults refuse to believe in "nonsense" such as Santa or magic. Though I realize Santa is not a big man with a long white beard and a red nose who brings me gifts, I still love to sit back and appreciate the wonder of the persona of Santa and all things associated with him. 

I love to be childlike, appreciating the little gifts of each day and the wonders of everything. Children don't have to try to do this- it's simply in their nature. They don't let preconceived ideas get in the way. They take each new object or experience on its own and pick it apart, examining every little part. So when adults or even older children take this amazement away from young ones, it breaks my heart. Children are meant to explore. They are naïve- innocent little beings- but that may be the best part. They don't pass judgment or hatred upon others. Disgust is the last sense to develop. They only dislike things or people that have hurt them before. If adults kept thus neutral state of mind- experiencing each thing on its own without preconceived ideas; eliminating judgment or hatred- the worked would be a better place. 

6:1 fall break

Though starting school a couple weeks earlier in August didn't seem like it would be worth it at first, I couldn't be happier with the new school schedule now. This fall break is perfectly timed, and I think everyone will benefit. This-coming week, I'll get a chance to get away bad focus on school work and getting organized. Even though I'll be camping part of the week, and at Tahoe for the rest, I'll still have ample time to get caught up on homework, work on other school projects, and get everything organized. I'm also going to apply for more scholarships and to UNR. I will also dedicate some time to continue working on my service project for my Capstone. I want to get caught up with everything this break, and start getting ahead instead of simply getting by day-to-day. With 3 AP tests and an EMT certification process ahead, I need to get on board with everything going on. I'm very excited for this break because I know I'll be able to relax, but still have time and ability to set myself up for success for the rest of this year. 

5:2 the kind of woman I want to be

Oh, how I dream of a life, quite like my cousin, Brittany's. To pull off any look, pull off long hair, and look great in any picture. To marry happily and have a beautiful family. To have everything put together and be so classy. To model with ease and do anything I want. To be so confident that you'd be able to see it. 

Perhaps I'm wanting to grow up too fast. I should be young while I can, and a little immature. But I can't seem to find the good in that. I just want everything to fall in place now, to not have any worries about the present, and be confident in my future. 

I want to know that it will all be okay. I want what I have now to transition gracefully into my adult life. Everyone says I'm still a kid, but in a few months, I'm legally an adult. It's time to take responsibility for myself and be able to provide for the life I want to live. I feel like I'm being pulled between people who say to stay young and childlike and that I'm growing up too fast, and the reality of my own destiny and that I have the power to do whatever I wish. 

I love learning, but what if I don't want to go to college? There are so many people who live very successful lives, and did not attend, or did not graduate from college. Do I have the potential to do so as well? What makes someone good for a job? Does a degree automatically make someone better than someone else who has a great amount of experience? No matter which path I choose, I'm going to start at the bottom and have to work hard to get to the top. I don't know what my dream job is- I just want to help people. I realize there is a myriad of great information and skills I could gain from attending college, but am I really missing out if I don't go? Yes, a degree would provide me with something to fall back on in case things don't work put, but how valuable are degrees currently anyway? 

I'm not sure where I want to go, or how I'm going to get there, but I know the kind of woman I want to be. Successful, put together, classy, and happy. 

5:1 motifs

There seems to be a reoccurring theme in Hamlet, where characters spy on each other, either by themselves, or they hire someone else to do so. This motif occurs three times between Act I, Scene I, and a few pages into Scene II. The first instance occurs when Polonius hires Reynaldo to spy on Laertes. Polonius tells him to watch Laertes and tell people he knows him. Polonius also gives him permission to lie about Laertes (but not dishonor him), in order to find out more about his son. 

The king hires Rosencrantz and Guilderstern to spy on Hamlet. The king wishes to find out what's going on with Hamlet, as he has been acting strange lately. I'm worried about these two, as they are "Timon and Pumba"..I don't want them to die! But they will. 

Polonius, being the great father he is, is planning on giving his daughter to Hamlet, then spying on the two, to see what they do. The king also thinks this is a good idea. Polonius has assured the king that he is not lying about the young ones' love affair, so let him be beheaded..I have a feeling this will come back later. 

Three accounts of espionage so far. A very interesting motif. When will we see it next?

4:2 hamlet

Like Mr. Burge always tells us, Hamlet is a very enigmatic character. Though not all of his lines have multiple meanings, Hamlet's first four lines reflect his ambiguosity. These lines are found in Act I, Scene II, relaying a conversation between Hamlet and the king and queen. 

"A little more than kin, and less than kind." 

This seems simple enough on the surface, but upon deeper analysis this line has many different meanings. On a basic level, Hamlet implies that he doesn't like the new king.  This also means Claudius now has a closer relationship to Hamlet and is not very nice. Another component is that Claudius is now more "kin" than Hamlet can handle, as Claudius is now "uncle dad". 

"Not so, my lord; I am too much i' the sun." 

There is ambiguosity with the word "sun," as the sun sheds light, and it sounds like "son," which Hamlet is now the son of Claudius. When one is on the sun, they might be described as enlightened, which Hamlet could describe Hamlet. He knows what is going on between his mother and Claudius, which is hurting him (too much in the sun). Hamlet is also implying that he is getting too much attention, when he would rather be alone. Likewise, he wishes to mourn his father and be "gloomy" than bright, cheery, and celebrating. 

"At, madam, it is common." 

Hamlet is agreeing that mourning the loss of a loved one is common, but also implying that his mother is on the same level as commoners, and lowly. 

"Seems, madam? Nay, it is. I know not 'seems'." 

Hamlet has a bit of sass in replying to his mother, calling her out for not mourning her late husband. Hamlet says he is not pretending to be sad, but actually is grieving his father's death. 

4:1 this blog...

This blog. I swear it'll be the end of me. 

Probably not, but it still gets to me. 

Though I have a lot on my to do list that I "sweep under the rug," I can't get away with not writing blog entries. Therefore, the blog sits at the bottom of my priority list of things-I-can't-get-away-without-doing. 

I go through the week, getting by with what I need to do. Oh wait, I have to write a blog entry. 

Just finished my homework! Nope, gotta write a blog entry. 

Time for sleep! Guess what? Blog time! 

This blog is a burden to my sanity. Perhaps if I thoroughly enjoyed writing or had prolific ideas, blogging wouldn't be such a pain. However, I am who I am (not an avid author), and this blog continues to be a thorn in my side. 

Maybe it's the pressure of publishing my writing for the world to see. The perfectionist within me doesn't like cranking out bits and pieces of thoughts jumbled together. I like one piece of work that I have refined into what I consider close to perfection. 

My classmates always seem to be more ontop of things and are eloquent writers, where I am the one to write a jumbled mess that may or may not make sense. 

In a perfect world, I would have energy and focus to complete everything I need to do in a timely manner and nothing would get swept under the rug. However, in the "real world," life is full of distractions, and time really does fly. My priorities have changed from homework to a social life and wanting to do things my own way. A part of me desires to be that book-loving nine year-old again, but I know that I have grown up and feel like I don't have time to sit around and not be "productive." I get caught up with the fast pace of the world around me, and forget to take time for the little things. 

Instead of looking at the big picture all the time, I should also take a step back and focus on what I can do today that I will thank myself for later. 

Putting the blog at a higher priority may ease my stress about it, as once I make the time to write, it isn't such a daunting task. However, it can be difficult not to get caught in the mindset of "here's what I need to do, but there's so much, so I won't do it, and worry about it later." 

I guess that means for my own best interest, I will write again very soon. 

3:2 "when my love swears she is made of truth"

Shakespeare's sonnet, "When my love swears she is made of truth," changes meaning with each time it is read. Originally, this sonnet seems to describe a couple so in love that they forget their flaws when they're together. When read again, the ambiguous words stand out, such as "told" and "lies." The reader then notices that the speaker of the poem and his lover are of different ages, the latter being younger. The speaker seems to appreciate his lover's attempts to flatter him. However, "And wherefore say not I that I am old?" implies that the lover doesn't know the man's age. The line before that, "But wherefore says she not she is unjust?" suggests that the woman does not say whether or not she is faithful. "Oh, love's best habit is in seeming trust." This "seeming trust" is important, as it argues that the lovers feel that they trust each other, but still know it's not all real. From these lines, it can be seen that the relationship is not necessarily based on lies, but rather a small amount of truth. For the speaker, this doesn't seem to be much of a problem, as "lies" changes meaning in the penultimate line of the sonnet. "Therefore I lie with her and she with me," could suggest the two tell each other lies, flattering each other. However, it can be assumed that "lies" is referring to lying in bed together. This act clears the minds of the two lovers, making them forget their flaws and be consumed with the other. 

Shakespeare's sonnet briefly tells the story of two lovers, who are presumably insecure, as they trust each other, even while knowing the truth is not always told. Age and faithfulness are not shared at all, so are not actually lied about. This relationship is based on the desire to be wanted. 

3:1 children

There's just something about children that makes me have hope and feel good inside. When I think about them, I sit in amazement at everything about them. 

Children by nature are miracles, as human conception is such a strange and wonderful thing. Sometimes children full an empty space in parents' lives, giving them a sense of hope or purpose. These little humans change lives, whether as seen for the better or the worse. 

The curiosity children have shines in their eyes, as the simplest things amaze them. Things we take for granted- toys, shoes, water, hands, anything- are manipulated and inspected, as if to find the wonders they possess within them. Children are not born with preconceived ideas about what something is, what it's for, or how it works. It is up to them to work with an object in order to find that information. They learn from experiences what is good and what is bad. Likewise, children are not born hating anyone, no matter someone's gender, race, sexuality, religion, etc. If someone loves the child, they are loved back. As children grow, however, they are influenced by their environment instead of their own feelings. They no longer base judgment solely on how they are treated, but on opinions of others and stereotypes set by society. 

If we could all keep our childlike traits of wonder and excitement, curiosity and nonjudgmental love, then the world would be a better place.  

2:2 browning

Robert Browning's two poems, "Meeting at Night" and "Parting at Morning" go together, the latter being a sequel to the first. However, when looked at separately, these poems could be seen to have different meanings. "Meeting at Night" describes two lovers meeting after dark, both excited and nervous. I imagine both people to have butterflies in their stomachs, and their hearts beating rapidly. Adrenaline pumping, these two meet for an exciting night together. "Parting at Morning" then describes indeed the two lovers parting, though not how the reader would expect. This departure does not seem necessarily heart breaking or sad, as a separating couple might be. Instead, the speakers seems to feel free and almost happy to leave. Because of this, I think the lovers have different feelings for each other. This is not necessarily based on textual evidence, but I can imagine a situation. Perhaps these two are secret lovers, one with an ego, the other with low self-esteem. Both long to be desired, so meeting at night (when it's dark and no one can see them) to "spend time with each other" gives them both a rush. For the night, they forget about everything else but the other. However, in the morning the feelings have changed. The one with the ego feels better about his or herself, while the other may feel used. The last line of "Parting at Morning," "And the need of a world of men for me," makes me think the one with the ego is a woman, which is different than could be pictured for this character. I then think this woman may also have a low self esteem, which could be why she feels she needs the world of men in order to carry on. Like the sun and its light are codependent, so are this woman and the world of men. She needs them to feel good about herself, while they need her to feel good about themselves. Nonetheless, Browning's poems are thought-provoking. 

2:1 imperfections

The common thought of anybody: oh how I wish I were better. 

The negatives and imperfections are all too noticeable. 

Better body. Better hair. Better personality. Better life. 

It's hard to get back up when you find yourself on the ground,

But no one can help you unless you learn to help yourself. 

Sad as it is,

This is true. 

How much better would it be if we could turn all the wrongs into rights 

And live happily. 

I suppose life is all about self-acceptance and developing positive thoughts

But that's easier said than done. 

Not only is one against oneself

The eyes of the world seem to judge and hate as well. 

There is a glimmer of hope

Somewhere. 

Some days are good

Others not so good. 

Climbing mountains

And sliding back down.

Eleven at night may not be the best time to write.

Thoughts disassembled

Organization out the door. 

It's hard to get anything done, though

When you're on the same level as the floor. 

Tomorrow will be a better day. 

Less stress will follow me through 'til morning

Than the weight I feel holding me down now.

Sorrow will last for the night,

But joy comes in the morning. 

Psalm 30:5

1:3 hardy and heller

This is an extra, so the length doesn't count!

Reading "The Man He Killed" by Thomas Hardy reminded me of Heller's Catch 22. The speaker in this poem is similar to Yossarian, the protagonist in Heller's novel. Both characters seem to not fully understand what the point of war really is. They reflect on the fact that in any other circumstances, those men who are so-called enemies, could be friends or acquaintances with whom to have sophisticated conversations. Yet, here they both are, forced to kill they don't know for reasons unknown. Hardy and Heller both make excellent arguments for the absurdity of war and bring everything to a more basic level. When looked at upon each individual basis, war does not make sense. Soldiers must fight men and women just like them, simply from different parts of the world. We are all humans. When looked at closely, we see that this is true.

1:2 "is my team plowing"

Though we weren't assigned to read it for class, I read over "Is my team plowing" by A. E. Housman, and was moved by it. This is a poem between two friends; one dead, one alive. Up until the last stanza, this poem seems dear and sentimental. The dead man asks about the things of his past life, and his friend reassures him that everything is being taken care of. The dead man asks if his girl and his friend are happy and safe, and again he is reassured by his friend. However, the friend changes the meaning of the word "sleep," as we see with the last four stanzas:

"Is my girl happy,
That I thought hard to leave,
And has she tired of weeping,
As she lies down at eve?"

Aye, she lays down lightly,
She lies not down to weep:
Your girl is well contended.
Be still, my lad, and sleep.

"Is my friend hearty,
Now I am thin and pine;
And has he found to sleep in
A better bed than mine?"

Yes, lad, I lie easy,
I lie as lads would choose;
I cheer a dead man's sweetheart,
Never ask me whose. 

We can infer that the friend has taken a liking to his late friend's girl, which makes the reader think. This poem follows the style mentioned in  Housman's other poem, "Terrence, this is stupid stuff," where he admits that he writes pessimistic poetry, but is simply bettering himself to protect against reality. "Is my team plowing" is indeed a negative poem, expressing the cynical traits in human nature. Just like Caesar in his final moments, betrayed by his best friend, this dead man might too yell out, "et tu Brute?" if he were to learn was his friend has done.

Too often do situations like this happen, which makes me realize that Housman may be correct: humans by nature have only themselves in their best interest. Betrayal and deception are all too common, ruining relationships and breaking hearts. Housman gives readers a reality check for sure.

1:1 senior year

First post! Maybe a little short, and not totally perfected, but here it is!

English, government, and calculus, too

Scholarship essays and applications, woohoo

Yearbook portraits, pretty and nice

This senior year, I'm taking my own advice

Capstone project- watch it unfurl

This year I have to be a big girl

Though it is tough and there's so much to do

Senior year of high school. I'm almost through

Some friends will stay

Some will go

What matters most now is what I must know

About my future, it is near

These thoughts bring new fear

Prom will be here soon, 

a night to remember

Fire of our high school years burning out, leaving just embers

 We'll then walk across the stage,

Graduation. A coming of age. 

Tears will be shed, classmates held tight

Senior sunset, together for one more night

Then off we go, our own separate ways

Reminiscing of high school, remembering the days 

I hope we don't lose touch

That our paths cross again

Asking how you are and where you have been

What we've waited for is finally here

Have a great time

A great senior year